Saturday, April 30, 2011

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly -- Crown Royal presents the Matthew & Daniel Hansen 400

This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew is in Richmond to bring you this week's The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, mid-South style, complete with BBQ and washed down with NOS Energy drink. Enjoy!


Kyle Busch: he gets first billing as the race winner. He was stout, leading 235 laps and was stellar on the restarts. With the win, he puts himself in position to make the Chase, as he won his second race of the season. Good job Kyle!

Denny Hamlin: he sorely needed this good run. He led 33 laps en route to the runner up finish. Home cooking is what he needed and it tasted sweet.

Kasey Kahne: like Hamlin, he sorely needed a good run, and he got it. Now if he can put together a couple of wins, he could make the Chase as a wild-card.

David Ragan: great run by the UPS Ford tonight. The fourth place finish was his first top 5 finish in 2 1/2 years. I think he's putting together a very good season and a win isn't too far away.

Carl Edwards: he leaves Richmond still in the points lead as a result of his top 5 finish.

Honorable Mention: the rest of the lead lap finishers.


JJ Yeley: he was the first start and parker, running 38 laps and declaring himself done for the day.


Juan Pablo Montoya/Ryan Newman: they met up on more than one occasion. Newman got loose and got into him the first time, and Montoya got payback.

Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!

Thursday, April 28, 2011

2011 Mock Draft

Here is my 2011 Mock Draft:

  1. Carolina: Cam Newton, QB, Auburn.

  2. Denver: Marcell Dareus, DT, Alabama.

  3. Buffalo: Von Miller, DE/LB, Texas A & M.

  4. Cincinnati: A.J. Green, WR, Georgia.

  5. Arizona: Patrick Peterson, CB, LSU.

  6. Cleveland: Julio Jones, WR, Alabama.

  7. San Francisco: Robert Quinn, DE/LB, North Carolina.

  8. Tennessee: Blaine Gabbert, QB, Missouri.

  9. Dallas: Tyron Smith, OT, USC.

  10. Washington: Nick Fairley, DT, Auburn.

  11. Houston, Prince Amukumara, CB, Nebraska.

  12. Minnesota: Aldon Smith, DE, Missouri.

  13. Detroit: Anthony Castonzo, OT, Boston College.

  14. St. Louis: Corey Liuget, DT, Illinois.

  15. Miami: Mike Pouncey, C-G, Florida.

  16. Jacksonville: DaQuan Bowers, DE, Clemson.

  17. New England (from Oakland): J.J. Watt, DE, Wisconsin.

  18. San Diego: Cameron Jordan, DE, California.

  19. N.Y. Giants: Gabe Carimi, OT, Wisconsin.

  20. Tampa Bay: Ryan Kerrigan, DE, Purdue.

  21. Kansas City Chiefs: Nate Solder, OT, Colorado.

  22. Indianapolis: Danny Watkins, G/T, Baylor.

  23. Philadelphia: Jimmy Smith, CB, Colorado.

  24. New Orleans Saints: Cameron Heyward, DE, Ohio State.

  25. Seattle Seahawks: Jake Locker, QB, Washington.

  26. Baltimore Ravens: Muhammad Wilkerson, DT, Temple.

  27. Atlanta Falcons: Adrian Clayborn, DE, Iowa.

  28. New England: Mark Ingram, RB, Alabama.

  29. Chicago Bears: Derek Sherrod, OT, Mississippi State.

  30. N.Y. Jets: Phil Taylor, DT, Baylor.

  31. Pittsburgh Steelers: Aaron Williams, CB, Texas.

  32. Green Bay Packers: Martez Wilson, LB, Illinois.

Less than four hours before the draft! Have at it!

Sunday, April 17, 2011

The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly -- 2011 Aaron's 499

This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew is in the Heart of Dixie, Talladega, Alabama, for this week's The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly, complete with all the fixin's you can muster, and washed down with plenty of your choice of beverages! Enjoy!


Jimmie Johnson: this wasn't a typical, JJ-dominated victory. Yes, he did lead a total of 11 laps, but he ran the smartest race, hanging back and giving himself a chance to be there at the end. Good strategy, as he was able to avoid two Big Ones. And he was there at the end, beating Clint Bowyer by .002 of a second, tied for the closest finish in NASCAR history.

Clint Bowyer: he was the victim of that dreaded aero push coming out of Turn 4, allowing Johnson to catch up and eventually overtaking him. Otherwise, he was stout. He led the most laps in the race (38), gaining an additional point.

Jeff Gordon: for awhile, it looked like HE was going to take the checkered flag, with Mark Martin giving him a push, but he and Martin got separated close to the finish line.

Dave Blaney: he was STOUT, giving Blaniacs around the world hope that he would get his first Cup win, particularly with Kevin Harvick pushing him for most of the race. Kurt Busch changed all that when he punted him. More on Busch later. (I'm saving my ire for that.) Blaney led 21 laps and was en route to a strong finish when he was punted. An extra Good goes for the subsequent save he made. He finished 27th, the last car on the lead lap.

Kevin Harvick: no matter who he pushed, whether it was Blaney or Bowyer, they charged into the lead. His car was much better when he was doing the pushing than when he was being pushed. He started deep in the field and charged to a fifth place finish.

Dale Earnhardt Jr.: he was in a similar boat as Harvick, as he was better when he was pushing JJ. He gave JJ that final shove into the win. You could tell WHO was in the lead with the roar of the crowd being louder than the roar of the cars. Jr led 11 laps en route to a fourth place finish, further solidifying his place in the top 10 in points.

Honorable Mention: Jeff Burton, Mark Martin, David Gilliland, Joey Logano, Carl Edwards, and Greg Biffle.


Kevin Conway: he ran a total of TWO laps before parking and hotfooting it out of town with his winnings. (He probably was faster hotfooting it out of town than actually on the track!)

Kurt Busch: this is going to take ALL I have as an honest, semi-professional, semi-amateur writer to keep from going off on him. Here goes. Was this Talladega, or was this bumper cars at the local amusement park, Busch? You kept punting several good cars and putting them into walls, or causing Big Ones. Let's see: do the names Brad Keselowski (YOUR OWN TEAMMATE!), Trevor Bayne, and Dave Blaney ring a FRIGGING BELL? The Blaney incident in particular was what fired me up, because he HAD A CHANCE TO WIN, BUT YOU EFFED IT ALL UP!!! Remember what they say, PAYBACK'S A REAL BIATCH, and you just drew a HUGE bulls-eye on yourself. You were good enough with the right drafting partner to win the race, but you kept punting them into the wall!!!


Kurt Busch: see above.

Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!

Saturday, April 9, 2011

The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly -- 2011 Samsung Mobile 500

This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew is deep in the heart of Texas to serve you a heapin' helpin' of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, complete with Texas-style BBQ, all the fixin's, and washed down with plenty of Crown and Coke. Enjoy!


Matt Kenseth: as the race winner, he gets first billing. He was so dominant it looked like he was going to lap the entire field. (I think had there been fewer cautions, or a 120+ lap green flag run, Kenseth WOULD have lapped the field; he was THAT good.) Everyone else was battling for second place. Kenseth led 169 of 334 laps, or just over 50% of the race. You want to know if it's your day? He was trailing leader Clint Bowyer by about a second when Brian Vickers made contact with Bowyer and nearly spun him out. While Bowyer made a great save of the #33 Cheerios Chevrolet, he lost the lead to Kenseth, who promptly checked out. The win was Kenseth's first since the spring 2009 race at Fontana. Props also go out to the Killer B's, who kept increasing Kenseth's lead with every pit stop. Good job #17 team!

Clint Bowyer: he led 44 laps and was strong all race long. But as said earlier, drivers not named Matt Kenseth were battling for second place. Bowyer ended up being the best of those drivers.

Roush-Fenway Racing: with Kenseth (winner), Carl Edwards (3rd), Greg Biffle (4th), and David Ragan (1st career pole, 7th place finish), all four RFR drivers had stout runs. When your lowest finishing driver finishes 7th, that's pretty darn stout. At least this week, they seemed to have it together.

Paul Menard: he continues to impress with strong runs. You cannot overlook the connection he has with Slugger Labbe as his crew chief. They united in the second half of last season when both were with Petty Enterprises. Although Menard never led tonight, he was in the top 10 pretty much the whole evening.

Marcos Ambrose: he deserves props for having a strong car that stayed on the lead lap the entire race, and staying in the top 10 for pretty much the entire race. Ambrose even led a lap under green flag pit stops.

Kurt Busch: he goes in this category for leading 50 laps, mainly in the last third of the race. He rolled the dice on pit strategy, hoping for a caution to extend his fuel mileage near the end, but it stayed green.

Honorable Mention: Jimmie Johnson and Dale Earnhardt Jr and everyone else that finished on the lead lap.


Mike Skinner: he was the first start and parker, running a grand total of 36 laps before declaring himself done for the day and hotfooting it out of town with his prize money. Word has it the start and parkers meet in the Todd Bodine Meeting Room to pick numbers to see who draws the sticks first. Skinner drew first, and drew the short stick tonight.

Kevin Harvick: he was uncharacteristically bad tonight. He had a poor qualifying showing (29th) and even though he finished in the top 20, he was never a factor. He was consistently 3-5 mph slower than Kenseth. Only on occasion (and it was usually on a short run) was he either even with or slightly faster than Kenseth. The 29 crew did everything they could to try to tighten up the car, but it wouldn't tighten. It stayed loose throughout the race. Just one of those days when nothing worked. To his credit, the 29 team stayed focused and determined and were able to salvage a 20th place finish.

David Reutimann: a bad season got that much worse. He couldn't seem to stay out of anyone's way on pit road. That, and he blocked in his fellow competitors. He blocked in Kevin Harvick right after Harvick's crew gave him his best pit stop of the night. Reutimann made contact with Joey Logano as he was exiting his pit and ended up blocking Harvick's exit from his pit. That cost Harvick about 10 seconds on pit road, dropping him from potentially in the top 15 to 28th. Harvick never recovered, eventually finishing two laps down. Needless to say, Happy wasn't too happy. Reutimann finished 29th, five laps down.


Brian Vickers: hate to do this to BV, but his contact with Bowyer cost Bowyer a shot at a win. At that point, Bowyer HAD the car that could go toe to toe with Kenseth. WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING RACING WITH BOWYER? You were already a lap down, and Bowyer gave you room to pass him because you were faster at the time. If you had been a little more patient, BV, you'd have made up your lap the hard way!

Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!

Sunday, April 3, 2011

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly -- 2011 Goody's Fast Relief 500

This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew is in southern Virginia for this week's The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, served up with a Martinsville Hot Dog (or as many as your heart desires) and washed down with PLENTY of Budweiser! (But be sure to have a designated driver beforehand!) Enjoy!


Kevin Harvick: he snags this spot as this week's race winner. He qualified ninth but fell backwards early. Not until about halfway into the race did he start coming to the front. He was 17th at the red flag on Lap 226. From that point on, he started moving to the front, benefitted by a very long green flag run in which he led a lap, then two very quick cautions that allowed him to take the wave around and pit again. The pit strategy proved to be very beneficial, as on the penultimate pit stop he took two tires and moved towards the front, then on the final stop, he went with four tires and came out third. (He subsequently moved to second when Jimmie Johnson was busted for speeding entering pit road.) After a slow restart in which he was shuffled to fourth, Happy made his move. He passed Dale Earnhardt Jr for the lead with five laps to go and was able to pull away for his second consecutive win. With the win (his first in Cup at Martinsville), he moves to sixth in the points, and now has won in all three NASCAR divisions at Martinsville. Somehow that blown engine at Daytona now seems like years ago. Could Harvick make it three in a row at Texas on Saturday night? He runs very well there. We shall see. Great job Happy!!

Dale Earnhardt Jr: he may have thought he didn't have a great car. He was strong all day. He was in the top 15 for pretty much the whole race. And his pit crew was on top of its game, as Jr often gained spots on pit road. For awhile it looked like he was going to win, as he passed Kyle Busch late. But he knew the 29 was gaining 0.5 seconds a lap. He made one bobble too many and Harvick took advantage of it. Seeing the 29 right behind you late in the race WILL cause a driver to bobble. Ask Jimmie Johnson. That win is coming sooner rather than later, as the 88 team is running very well. Jr is now eighth in the points.

Kyle Busch: he led the most laps but faded late. IMO he used up all his equipment earlier and had nothing left at the end. He can win, he knows how to win, and a win is coming soon.

Juan Pablo Montoya: although he never led a lap, he was strong at the Big Paper Clip again, with another top 5 finish. He was in the top 10 for much of the race, and that fourth place finish is what this team needed. He stays in seventh place in the points.

Jeff Gordon: he checked out when he was leading, and was strong on long runs. But he struggled on restarts and short runs. Still, he merits a place here because he was strong overall, leading 37 laps en route to a fifth place finish.

Clint Bowyer: Harvick's RCR teammate led 91 laps and got plenty of face time for BB&T. However he faded very late, and held on for a top 10 finish.

Jamie McMurray: he won the pole in Saturday morning qualifying and led 31 laps. He faded for awhile, but rallied for a solid top 10 finish.

Honorable Mention: Matt Kenseth, David Ragan, and Mark Martin.


Joe Nemechek: he was the first start and parker. He had the misfortune to draw the short stick at the prerace start and parkers meeting in the Todd Bodine Meeting Room. He declared himself done after 25 laps.

Tony Stewart: he uncharacteristically struggled today. Even though it's well-known he starts the season slow and picks up, he's usually in the top 25 at the end of a race. If it wasn't pit road penalties, it was something else. Smoke was even caught up in a wreck. He limped home in 34th, nearly 40 laps down. (Smoke, it's not often that I put you here, but I must today.)


Dave Blaney: is he STILL causing an accident? He DID have a car that WAS competitive, and even after his first two accidents was still on the lead lap. The third accident doomed his chances of a strong finish. He did finish, but was 14 laps down at the end. And this relates to:

Tires: there were issues with the tires DURING the race. Blaney had three different incidents, and several other drivers cut tires and had to pit during green flag runs.

Martin Truex Jr/Kasey Kahne: these two were involved in a horrific crash on Lap 223 when Truex cut a tire and his throttle stuck. Kahne was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Truex hit the wall HARD and if it hadn't been for Kahne being a cushion, Truex would have hit the wall a second time. No matter what Truex tried to do to avoid Kahne, he couldn't. Truex even hit the kill switch on the #56 Toyota but THAT didn't work. Glad that both drivers are fine and will race again next week. A sub-Good to NASCAR for their improvements in safety.

Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to chime in!